I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I'm passing your future prison.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Randomize