I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
