You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
