Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize