Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
