She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
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