You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Randomize
