Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Randomize