he referred to my room as the tit cave...
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize
