that's an acceptable place to lick
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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