So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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