like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize