my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize