I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
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