My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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