oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize