He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize
