well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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