let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
