she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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