Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
