if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Randomize
