Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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