As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
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