I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
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