If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize