i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize