she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize