shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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