Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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