just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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