It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
