Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize
