I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
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