guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize