looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
being pregnant is like rehab
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
