Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Randomize
