I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
The feeling are messing with the penis
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
