Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
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