I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
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