i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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