omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
How external is "for external use only"?
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
