so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
honey bunches of taint.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
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