There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize