the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
i came on her dog
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
3 2 1 whiskey
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
