They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
cat food counts as protein by the way
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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