My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
Randomize
