She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Randomize
