How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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