He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Randomize
