Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
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