are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
